Monday, July 22, 2013

Like moving through jello,

I was slowly heading toward the little SUV in front of me and I knew that I couldn't avoid it.  I was braking but my brakes felt useless against the death wagon I drive.  Apparently it takes more time to stop a mini-van than it does to stop a little car.  Who knew, right?

We collided.  The car in front pushed into the car in front of him and I found myself in serious trouble.  My seatbelt didn't lock and I was thrown forward.  I smashed my head against the steering wheel then the momentum drove my head back to the headrest.  My knees slid forward and hit the dash.  I did real  damage to my body.

Luckily, I don't have anything truly seriously wrong with me.  There aren't any brain bleeds or broken bones.  Sadly though, I have these chronic pain problems that keep me up and make it so that I have a hard time functioning.   The hit on the steering wheel caused a concussion.  I now have short term memory loss.  I can't remember things told to me minutes after we discussed them.  It's frustrating as I have to carry a planner and cell phone just to remind myself where I have to be and who I'm supposed to meet.  Oh, and don't get me started on the physical pain.  The whiplash hurts so bad that that I can't sleep at night and holding a squirming baby is pure torture.  I've been here before.  I know it can last for months but I don't remember it hurting THIS bad.

Two days ago, I dropped a toy on my foot trying to clean the toy room.  It's now all bruised.  I can honestly say that I hurt from my head to the bottom of my toes. 

Man, this is a depressing post.  Some days are like that though, right?  Especially at 4 in the morning when sleep eludes you because pain is just too much to bear anymore.

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